I'd fallen in love with a woman but she broke up with me and I was devastated. Six months later, I went into a suicidal depression from the break-up of the relationship, but I resolved to not do what my friends had done. And so I reached out for help.

I did get myself into this. Somehow, in some convoluted way, it’s what I’ve been looking for in my life. How else did I come to be here? We create our lives. I don’t fully understand why, but little by little I get that somehow I’ve wanted something like this to happen. I’ve been looking for adventure, and I’ve found it.

It was the first time the features and formative processes of the desert had made me pause and absorb just how small and brave we are, we the human race.

I feel like I’m climbing as well, if not better, than ever.

I was accustomed to being in far, far riskier environments. So I thought going into that canyon was a walk in the park – there were no avalanches, it was a beautiful day and I was essentially just walking.

The rock strata of the inner canyon changed from dark umbers and black shadows to immense bands of pastel yellow, white, green, and a hundred shades of red in the mysterious chemistry of twilight.

Eventually, I sickened of people, myself included, who didn’t think enough of themselves to make something of themselves – people who did only what they had to and never what they could have done. I learned from them the infected loneliness that comes at the end of every misspent day. I knew I could do better. – MARK TWIGHT, “I Hurt, Therefore I Am.

Like looking through a telescope into the Milky Way and wondering if we’re alone in the universe, it made me realize with the glaring clarity of desert light how scarce and delicate life is, how insignificant we are compared with the forces of nature and the dimensions of space.

Judging by my degradation in the last 24 hours, I’ll be surprised if I make it to Tuesday.

How would I behave in a situation that caused me to summon the essence of my character? The tragedy inspired me to test myself. I wanted to reveal to myself who I was: the kind of person who died, or the kind of person who overcame circumstances to help himself and others.